Pinterest......

has a bunch of cool stuff.

Loving these in particular today.

Bits and pieces

I had no intention of not blogging for so long.
So long until I didn't realize there was a new interface in Bloggers.
I prefer the old one because this looks too much like......Google+.
Haven't adjusted, haven't toured around yet.

*
Watched Mirror Mirror earlier some time.
And Battleship today.

**
Fitfully thankful things to mention;
(#141) Vi's gonna get me CDs.
(#142) Nana's Nandos and A-Z.
(#143) Pretty papers

***
We're always in a lull.
Looking over this side for the last 3 weeks,
Heart aching fiercely for the other side.
Not knowing which side to take that final step to.

And the dreams.
Always dreaming of this and that,
Swirling my insecurity, anxiety, fear, doubt and frustrations into them.
No longer knowing which will come true and which wouldn't.

The fence isn't high.
This isn't a black or white situation.
Just cloudy grayed because of the people that I think I need on both sides.
And that is where the problem lies.

I need You, not them.
I know but it's so hard to look at the invisible You vs the real physical them.
Just a call, just a message away.
Instead of prayers that I fail to believe You hear.

I don't know how much longer I can stand up here.
This situation that seems so familiar.
Back in school I loved being with the naughtier, cheekier crowd.
But was equally drawn to God's friends.

It wasn't hard then to have both.
This hour in this.
That hour in there.
So why is it so hard now?

A string of thoughts

3 hours was ridiculous.
Who spends over an hour getting one new song right?
Who in their right mind wakes someone up to get excited over a new song.
Only the slave driver would.

But you knew it was going to be this way. 

You knew he'd pushed you to your limits.

You knew this was going to be good for you.

You knew you'd be excited if there's a new song with piano on it.

That's why you wanted it.

You didn't want to miss such a moment.

And this is such a moment.

Why does the still small voice have to be right?
I revisited my old posts, to see if I'd ever vent about slave driver.
But I found this instead;

Mark the beautiful days,
forget the bad days.

To mark this day beautiful, which come to think of it I haven't done so for a long while,
I would say it's an honor to play the new song.
After all, maybe he wouldn't have done it without me. *hysterical laugh* Yes, that was my ego talking.
And it was fun. I laughed hard with the mishaps on the other songs in the set. (thankful #139 for the rarity these days)


In some ways (thankful #140), who would have known this would turn me back to the right direction?
I'm a tad anxious. And anxiousness is way better than going through the motions.
I know over and over again, with slave driver, all I want to do is strive to serve Him better.
Worship Him more. Because there's no pleasing men here. More like, this one can't be pleased. Ha!

So surely when I most need it, He knows. What I most need, He knows too.
If it's You, God. Then it's You.


Come to think of it, I'm nowhere near a 1000 things to be thankful of.
And with this season, it's even harder to come by.
But if I could find those little thankfuls, wouldn't it in some ways put me on a long string no matter how lost in space from Him I may be?
Like a kite, flying not with the wind but against it. But always dropping back to where the One who holds the string is.
That metaphor doesn't really work when He's not standing on Earth where gravity brings the kite back.
But.... yeah. A string.




An hour long string of thoughts, what this is.

Good Friday

Before I believed, He bore it all on the cross.
Before my denials, He denied Himself.
Before I found Him, He found me.
Before the praises formed within, He hears them.
Before a hardened heart, He waits.




And sometimes, remembering doesn't sensitizes a heart that has strayed.

Madness when the sun sets...

Mad because Michael W. Smith's Decades of Worship just got in and I was there to get it!
Little perfect timing like this makes me realize I'm so blessed! (thankful #137)

Mad because I bought 5 CDs within......an hour.
Yes, yes, yes, yes and yes!

Mad because I just removed these from my dad. (thankful #138 it went okay)

Yes. Geli. And there was blood.
There's more next week.

But I'm so freaking high from buying all those CDs.

Now I have to figure out how to fit them into my car along with the rest.

My CD collection is definitely growing every year.

And I know it's silly when you can get everything online these days.

I think as long as I still have a CD player, I would still buy them.