A little update...

I finally finish backdated posts of New Zealand.

Feeling blessed part 2

As I backup and clear away my photos for the new memories I'm making this October,
I found many moments that had made me laugh and smiled throughout this year.

Despite many insecure, paranoid and anxious moments,
the only ones captured are those that had made me smile.

In this clear moment of sanity, I'm just thankful for the year that I've had.
Thankful for the many meals I have enjoyed.
Thankful for the many board games I've played.
Thankful for the movies I've seen.
Thankful for the friends I have.

It amazes me that my Martha tendencies haven't left me even without serving in church.
And to just accept the fact that I don't do well in big groups.
I'm coming to accept the reality of having a week of crazy days each month.

So, I'm thankful that it's also been almost a year of discovering me.

I don't know what the future holds, but one thing is for sure.
I can't run away from Him.
I know now the whole membership thing happening so suddenly was His way of emphasizing on the you're-one-of-them-now, even though I couldn't help feeling like it is such a threat to my freedom.
Like, even more now than ever, my time is limited and I will be cornered.
And the paranoia can go on and on, bringing on the desperate tears.
But it isn't going to happen today, because today is one of the better days.

Anxiety

I'm glad I have a little friend called Inderal to help me tonight.

Feeling blessed...

I've received my first present and it's from Sephora!!!!!!

Weeeee!!!!!!

On another note, this last week had been a stretch on my comfort zone.
Wednesday, I redeemed free movie tickets from GSC.
They wouldn't let me watch 2 shows, so I just took two for Boxtrolls and randomly start whatsapp-ing people if they'd like to watch. And one of them came, though she has watched it once already.
Then on Thursday, I got asked to go exercise after work on Friday. Me. The sloth.
So I agreed, deciding after all I haven't been to Botanical Gardens since last year.
Stranded in the rain on Friday wasn't part of the plan, nor was going through flash floods all over Georgetown.
I spent two days hiding at home, hoping the rain would stop and it did today when I came over for a movie, hanging out in the afternoon and sleeping over tonight.
When I came over this morning, I was greeted with my present.
Something so totally unexpected, when I still doubt if I've made them my own friends or these are still Nana's.

I've come to realize from these consecutive events that it's okay to take a step back, reach out and let in.
And it's a lesson I need to remember; not to doubt my worth or to worry what people see in me.

Epic-ness

A stroll through BG turned into a really tiring night what with the never ending rain, falling down and flash floods.

I'm thankful that the shelter spot was just nearby and no monkeys came to share it with us despite them being really close to us.

I'm thankful for Oli to have gone for the umbrella in the rain (though I wish she had done it sooner since she was after all the faster one between us). And also for finding my specs when I lost it after falling down and getting wet anyway on our way back to the car.

I'm thankful specs wasn't washed away in the current, and despite my ankle hurting, that I could still walk. And also for not having any scrapes on my elbow and legs from the fall.

I'm thankful for not driving into any pot holes or getting any accidents despite going through flash floods and having very wet dangerous brakes as a result.

I'm thankful to have finally reached home.

I would probably think twice about going to BG soon again.