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I had fun hunting down a bike.
I'm thankful it wasn't in the bikes only lane.
Also, I'm thankful that the rain only started drizzling after I found it.
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I have a long post in my head about last weekend.
Just that I'm excellently busy enough not to find the time to trim photos and gather my feelings about it.
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Tomorrow I'm off for another day of drumming, this time with my new sticks. =D
I'm thankful I still have Big Bro to go to every once in a long while.
I loved you long before you met me
And then you gave your life to me
But should one day you turn and walk away
I will always love you
I will always love you
I will always love you, yes I will
I always will
My love will never cease towards you
But should I have a change of heart
It is because my heart has ceased to beat
I will always love you …
When all around you seems in darkness
When you have plumbed right to the depths
No pit is so deep I’m not deeper still
I will always love you …
And when the day has almost ended
When evening comes and walls you in
When there is no one else to comfort you
I will always love you …
Here are my arms for you to cling to
Here are my wounds where you can hide
Here are the tears that I have cried for you
I will always love you …
My love is constant as the sunrise
As changeless as the stars of night
My child, as sure as the returning tide
I will always love you …
Been in a new battle to not have/develop a Martha complex.
I said this in a NaF session the other day, "Dying to self, is not trying in our own strength."
Yet here I am doing this and that, constantly thinking what needs to be done next.
Either at work or in church, the same buzz is there in my head.
And then there's the constant reminder of what I've done, what I've regretted every time I see Cub.
It's hard to constantly remind myself I've let go; that I'm not paying the price now for what I've done.
And to just be that new person that God wants me to be.
Somehow it seems like to be someone new, I have to live a certain way now.
Whether in speech or in making nail polish or hair dye choices.
What reflects Him? Is this too much of me wanting my way, my colors?
Questions that drives me constantly on my toes.
It's all a mess I can't untangle myself from.
Certainly not in one go, certainly not in my own strength.
But nothing is impossible with Him, and one day at a time, one step at at time; I'll get there.
With this song above, I hear a leisure pace to hang on to.
Not to be rushed.
A reminder that His mercies are new every morning.
Even today.
More than anything, that I'm loved just the way I am.
Even if someday my hair is all purple and I'm putting on fluorescent green nail polish again.
So how does this affect worship today?
Last Sunday I abandoned the team, solely just focused on Him.
An easier feat when you are standing off to one side on the keyboard.
It's so hard to jump ship when you are on the piano, in the core area.
The tendency to want to keep a lid on everything, especially on the drums to drive us along is high.
But nothing is impossible in Him.
And to do all things, in His love, it would be whatever He wants it to be.
So here's hoping to find the balance in playing, in guiding the others and most of all in enjoying worship to Him later.
Lord, I just want to rest in Your arms. Help me to surrender to You, this life and all that I am right now. Because You just love me anyway I am. Amen.
